Okay so maybe that was a bit harsh. However! We see these commercials with people honoring Dad’s and buying him things and saying how much of a difference he made in their lives and just how he was the “most perfect father”.
These commercials apply to maybe 20% of the population. Okay maybe 30%. My point is, I have found out that most people didn’t have “picture perfect commercial worthy parents”. In some cases Mom and Dad were both worth less than nothing. They were sociopaths.
So what do you do if Father’s Day is coming up and you had a crappy father that abused you. Abuse does not mean he didn’t get you a sucker at the bank. Or he didn’t buy you a car for you 16th birthday. Or you called and he didn’t answer the phone. Those are NOT abuses.
I’m talking about a father that was abusive mentally, physically, emotionally, verbally and maybe even sexually towards their child. I’m talking about life long-lasting effects of trust issues, body image issues, low self-esteem, failed relationships. And in some cases crates of xanax, abilify, prozac and everything else you have to take because God assigned you the biggest butt wipe since Satan for a Dad. Not to mention uncontrollable flashbacks and anger issues because the abuse was never resolved. It was just blamed on you.
Outside factors such as drugs and alcohol can play into the abuse. Anti social personality disorders or maybe dear old Dad was just born without a conscious. If that is the case then he truly has no idea that the abuses on his children are hurtful. It’s just another day in the life to him.
So if someone with a crappy father is inundated with these Happy Father’s Day commercials showing this loving perfect smiling family while you can’t even talk to your Dad because he was and still is a pile of crap. How does that play on your psyche?
Its time for rebuttals from the over opinionated disillusioned peanut gallery:
“you should just forgive”
“you should try to work it out”
“that’s over with by now why are you still mad”
“don’t get mad at others just because you had a bad Dad”
“why don’t you just ask your dad to apologize”
“get over it already”
“kill him with kindness. still get him something”
“you’re just being a brat”
“maybe it wasn’t your dad. it was you”
SHUT UP! <-That was directed at the peanut gallery.
Look. This whole Happy Mothers Day and Happy Fathers Day is aimed at less than 50% of the population who lives in some sort of fantasy land while the rest of us were thrown into harsh horrible reality.
The reality is not everybody had a good dad. Not everybody had a happy childhood. These commercials and cards and crap do nothing more than rub it in people’s faces of what you wished you could have had but didn’t because your old man betrayed your trust by abusing you in ways that he should be in jail for right now!
If you had a great Dad then hey! HAPPY FATHER’S DAY TO HIM!
If you had a low life maggot for a Dad then use your own judgment and discretion on whether or not you want to wish him anything. Its your choice. Those people in happy butt namby pamby land have no right to judge you or what you decide to do. You know where you are in your life and you know how you feel about your Dad. If you don’t give him anything or don’t call that is YOUR right.
Thank you for reading. I feel better now.