WHAT’S WRONG WITH ME?! Why can’t I FOCUS?
If you are someone who has Maldaptive Daydreaming, and you notice that you are being left behind then you’ve probably asked this question to yourself. “What is wrong with me?”
Most Maladaptive Daydreamers have a problem focusing. The daydreams interrupt whatever you are doing causing you to either not complete what you start or do it wrong because of the uncontrollable distraction.
Some people look around them and see that thier childhood friends have graduated college, living in nice houses, driving nice cars, either own or are a CEO of a company, or have some kind of high end job while you are still either unemployed or at a low end job seeming not to advance. This does not pertain to everybody but some MD’ers have been left behind because of the extra factor.
Someone asked me why I can’t just over come this or stop it. I was told I had the power to control it and stop it and I should make the conscious decision to focus. That is someone who clearly does not understand the depth and magnitude of #1. Maldadptive Daydreaming and #2. Just how deep and layered this is for some people.
This is not just simply saying, “Oh if I won the lottery I’d buy a jet plane and go to Tahiti.” Then you imagine the island and that’s the end of the fantasy. No, this is much much more complex than that.
The Maladptive Daydreamers who are unable to focus usually end up failing in school, not graduating high school, not completing college, not keeping a job, can’t stay in a relationship and if they do it can be challenging, and get along with only select people at a job if they able to keep it.
In addition to asking “what’s wrong with me” anger, depression, frustration and aggravation can set in on the person. Not because of feeling like a failure, but because they don’t know what to do about the daydreaming which is the reason for not focusing. It turns into a cycle that hurts self esteem and leads to the next obvious question, “What do others think of me?” If I feel like a failure then others must see me as one too.
If you are a Maladaptive Daydreamer and you are asking yourself this question, just know that you are not alone. Until medical professionals will listen and decide to help we have to support and help each other.